I was intrigued to read an article earlier this year that describes the introvert's plight perfectly: it's not a matter of being shy, but rather finding peace and comfort in having time to yourself. In other words, introverts are not re-charged through high-energy, frenetic exchanges, but through moments of solitude, peace, and introspection.
I always have, and continue to, struggle with such a notion. Shouldn't being a mother...wife...teacher...daughter...sister...invigorate me enough to keep me fueled to face each and every day? Well, no.
See, for some of us, the natural recharging of life's battery requires time to one's self. For me, it's nothing fancy. I love blaring music (and dancing like -- thank the Lord -- no one sees), reading trashy magazines, and vegging out to any number of TV shows or movies. (Tom Petty, Stephen King's The Green Mile, and Once Upon a Time...I can barely contain myself...whew! And that's just a sampling of my introverted pleasures! ☺️)
And like any good modern woman, it results in feelings of guilt. After all, shouldn't everyone and everything in my world be enough? Yet again...no. Teaching lets me plan alone; blogging & acting let me become someone else; concerts let me hide in the noise; and Key West lets me be surrounded by people while given the opportunity to fall into the oceans and Gulfs of the world.
See, we owe not a single thing to anyone. Life is here, a monumental yet humble offering...simply to live. Today, on the glorious seventh day of my Christmas vacation, my parents offered to watch my daughter for an undetermined number of hours so I could rest, run errands ... whatever. And God help me, I let them, with no small amount of guilt. I listened to music at an unacceptable volume (would you believe it ranged from Whitesnake to Wheatus to Mumford & Sons?!), took a nap, and read fanfiction about my favorite shows (some, admittedly, with dirty undertones). When I brought Grace home after mindless hours to myself...I was a better person. I'd had peace, quiet, and the chance to revel in solitude. And once again, I was ready to face the world...because God knows, as an introvert, I just sometimes need the chance to be alone. And hey, you out there, feeling the same way? Take that time; it's best for all of us.